Lessons From A Jiujitsu Tournament

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Who knew what a learning experience attending my oldest son’s jiujitsu tournament would be for me?

Hiccups from the moment we arrived.  I couldn’t find a parking spot, so he had to walk in alone.  When I finally walked into the arena, it didn’t take me long to find him standing over by the “Weigh In” table.  He didn’t look very happy and I went over to see what was wrong. He explained to me that they were calling in the coordinators because he was over his weight limit.  He was very confused as to why. He’d entered the 145-155 pound division and had weighed in at 150. After about 30 minutes of complications, they had it straightened out, and he was ready to go.  

The place was packed!  We had not expected this tournament to be near the size it was.  I was already nervous. This was only his 2nd tournament, and having recently turned 18, he now had to enter the adult division.  While we were watching one of the first fights, the medics were called and a participant taken out on a stretcher because he had lost consciousness and took too long to regain it.  I wanted to leave. He did not.

During the next fight, we watched a guy break his wrist.  Now, I really wanted to leave! He still did not. As his first fight time came nearer, I was trying to hide my full blown panic and he was getting more and more antsy to get on the mat.  

His number was called and off he sauntered.  I held my breath. It didn’t take long for him to lose the match.  I could see the disappointment on his face and thought this was my window to talk him into leaving.  Nope! He was still excited and couldn’t wait for the next match. He talked with his coaches and was determined to not lose again.  As I sat on the sidelines, watching his coaches encourage and mentor him, I was in awe. How did I raise this boy to have no fear and so much dedication and perseverance?  I would have turned tail and taken off running. He was not a quitter. He just kept going. The next fight went much better, and the ones after that, even better! I could hardly breathe the whole long 6 hours of the tournament.  I watched him fight 10 times! During one of the later matches, he took a hit to the nose and there was so much blood that they had to pause the match, call a medic, and try to get it under control. My heart stopped and I felt like I would faint.  All I could see was blood. Blood all over my “baby boy”. Did he get upset or give up? Nope. He just kept going, giving his all in each match. I could see him getting more and more exhausted, but he was undeterred. His perseverance sure paid off as he took 1st place in the “no gii” event.  

I could see the fatigue taking it’s toll on him, but yet he stayed happy and cordial and encouraging to the others.  I saw him cheering on his opponents during their matches. I saw him taking advice and talking with his mentors.

So, what did I learn exactly?  I learned that training and dedication are an integral part of our children’s lives.  I learned that my son has the strength, both inside and out, of a true warrior. He will never let any hurdles stand in his way, and not just when on the mat.  He is a confident young man who is not afraid to look adversity right in the eye. No matter how against him the odds may seem, he won’t give up. I learned that he doesn’t let disappointments or fatigue affect his personality.   I am proud of him. I want to be more like him. The traits that he possesses are traits that I long to have. I’m not sure when the tables turned, but I truly learn more from him now than I think he learns from me. I couldn’t help but sit there, staring at him in awe, and thinking how did my little boy become this confident, self-assured young man that I see now.

When we got home, he was exhausted.  He gave me a hug, thanked me so much for making this day possible for him, and headed to shower and go to bed.  I was shocked at how appreciative he was. How can he thank me for making this possible when his behavior gave me a whole new perspective for how I want to live my life?  I can’t remember the last time I really gave 100% to anything, especially not when there were hurdles in my way. I now see some changes I need to make in my life.  I want to strive to demonstrate the characteristics he showed today.

Don’t be afraid to learn lessons from your children!
When our children are young, we often feel like they don’t hear or see anything we try to teach them.  There are times that we, as parents and teachers, feel unappreciated and unsure of what we’re doing. Don’t give up!  They do notice each sacrifice we make, and our perseverance. The results sometimes aren’t seen immediately, but that foundation is being set in stone.   So even when you are having a bad day, try to remember that your children are watching how you overcome adversity and will one day emulate that behavior.

What are some lessons you have learned from watching your children?