Have you ever had one of those days?
You know what I’m talking about. Everyone overslept, woke up grouchy or not feeling well. You have a to-do list about a mile long and ZERO energy and ambition. You’ve dealt with squabbling, bad attitudes, and potty accidents all day. You look at the clock, realize it’s 2 pm and no one has eaten lunch and you haven’t even thought about dinner yet. You’re feeling like a complete failure. We’ve all been there. It’s these times that you need to stop thinking, stop putting yourself down, look around you and count your blessings. Those dishes will still be there tonight(and tomorrow). Your to-do list isn’t going anywhere. But, you can still take the time to love on your children. To love this day, this chapter in your life.
So the next time you’re feeling like a failure, stop, breathe deeply, and remind yourself that IT’S OK.
It’s ok if the kids don’t get a bath today.
It’s ok if you all eat cereal at 2:00.
It’s ok if you sit on the couch and cuddle and read together, instead of doing the chores.
It’s ok to say “no” to an afternoon/evening commitment because you just need to re-focus.
It’s ok to turn on some music and have a crazy dance party.
It’s ok to all lie down and take a nap, just because.
It’s funny, now that my older kids are teens/young adults, I realize just how much they don’t remember. The days when I thought I was messing up their lives. They don’t remember me having a breakdown or freaking out because I was so behind on the dishes. They remember me sliding the mattress into the middle of our living room, having everyone put on pj’s, and declaring it a “sleepover” day. They remember the pillow fights. They don’t remember the mess. They remember making the forts. They don’t remember that we only ate cereal; they remember that we ate in a fort in the living room with only flashlights. They don’t remember when our oven broke and we ate sandwiches for a week. They remember each coming up with an idea for a creative “new” sandwich (yes, we ate peanut butter with sprinkles one day). They didn’t realize that when there were mountains of clothes in the living room, I was stressed over sorting it all. They thought it was a “throw into the right colored basket” game.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. Plan something special–either for the rest of the day or for the next day. Your children would rather have a day of lazy cuddles than a parent that is completely frazzled, short-tempered and on the verge of tears. They don’t care if they eat on paper plates or have to wear their pajamas for two days in a row. IT’S OK!
I know I’m not the only mom that has ever felt this way. What are some of the ways that you find to help yourself that “IT’S OK”?
This is such an important life lesson. We need to learn to be kinder to ourselves and ‘enjoy every moment’. Loved this post – great to be reminded about what’s really important in life.
Thank you!!! I agree. Sometimes it is easier to be hard on ourselves than it is to live in the moment!
Thank you for writing this because this was me today. I was grouchy and stressed out and the dishes were not getting washed, hubby eventually fed the kids and I felt as though I was stopping fights all day but not being an example myself. Said sorry 100 times yet didn’t learn to just take a break!! We are all close and a loving family but it seems when mommy is having a bad day, they all have a bad day. I feel like a failure for not being a good example and for not practicing what I preach some days. Anyway tomorrow will be better.
I’ve been there and completely understand how you were feeling.
You are right, tomorrow will be better!
Remember, it’s going to be OK!
Just keep doing the best you can and try not to be so hard on yourself!
This is exactly what we need to hear! We all need to remember that we are human, and not bathing your child isn’t going to ruin them completely!
Right?? I’m embarrassed to admit that there was a time, in my early parenting days, where I honestly thought they would be ruined if not bathed daily! I’m so glad I was able to overcome that and learn to enjoy my kiddos!
Thank you for posting this. I’ve had many of those days lately. On the weekends, my daughter has stayed in her pj’s, we don’t eat lunch on time and I don’t feel like I’ve gotten enough cleaning done, but it’s always there tomorrow. I struggle with this because I feel like I need to do it all and be good at everything. I’m glad I’m not alone knowing that we all struggle with this at some point.
Yes!! You’re right! This struggle is so real that it can debilitating if we don’t intentionally put a stop to the pressure we put on ourselves.
I feel like this almost everyday. I am so busy and worn out. Having chromic illness isn’t helping. Years ago I just decided to let things be. I still get frustrated with myself but I know my kids just want me time and everything else sometimes can wait.